We Interrupt "When Someone You Love Has A Blog" -- A Husband's Response

Sigh. First it was Baby E, and now his dad. Everyone wants their say on this blog. Nothing in this house is private, and my husband, along with everyone else in this home, follow this blog's posts, since this blog is pretty much 99.9% our family's blog.

I awoke to the following note on our kitchen counter, which prompted today's post.

Today, since we run a kingdom that is fair, we feature, "Tech Support Responds" as part of our When Someone You Love Has A Blog, Part I,  Part II, and now, our "surprise" guest contribution to the series, "Live-In Tech Support,"   as prepared by The Emperor.

Blogging: A Husband's Response

• Beloved blogger, [wife], shall not address husband as "tech support."
• Said that, "tech support" is not available during husband's wage earning hours. As in, no phone calls to work asking how to embed a YouTube video on her post for that day.  It may be difficult for her to believe, but that is not what is known as "Level 1-Emergency." 
• Tech Support's hours must be respected. No pre-alarm clock wake ups. Whether comments are appearing or not for her post that day, it can truly wait. In other words, please let me sleep.
• Said that, do not abuse on site tech support.

• As much as blogging has made for a much happier wife [beloved blogger], said person must still engage in her real life relationships, and look up from the computer as well as remove fingers from keyboard when husband/significant other is attempting conversation. Time together must be spent, drive through McDonald's does not count.
• The member in the household who clothes, feeds, and provides shelter should not have to wait in line or take a number to use the computer. Do you all like the computer? Good. Remember who brought it home. 
• Beloved blogger [wife] must provide evidence of at least attempting to apply herself and figure out how to perform a task on blogger either through BloggerHelp or by googling. Same as I have to do. (as I've said before, there is no "secret code" that I know when I google problem solving situations and sites. )
• Last note to wife/beloved blogger, "with 25 years of professional work experience, why don't you listen to me when I suggest  changes to your copy? I'm not just here for fodder."

In summary, to all beloved blogger's support staff, when you think of calling your blogger out about her time spent away from the family, recalling fondly the days of pork tenderloin and glazed carrots, think of your wife's/beloved blogger's happiness. As the wife's/blogger's happiness goes, so goes the household.

Readjust your thinking.

A bowl of cereal for dinner surrounded by your family and served with a happy smile and warm laugh tastes better than any 7 course meal eaten alone in the finest restaurants of Paris, HongKong, Brazil, Amsterdam, Italy, India, Sydney, or Spain.   

Believe me, I've had both.

History's Longest Post, But I Promise You A Point

On that winter day years ago, when it was so cold out we didn't leave the house for a second, I am so glad I said yes when you asked me if you could ride the vacuum cleaner and pretend it was your motorcycle, instead of saying no, it'll burn the motor out. You haven't asked to do that for years.

,

When you came to my side that morning of busy laundry folding, and told me that you wanted to be the giant of your own city and asked me if I could do that for you, I am so glad I put down the clothes and made you a city of your very own. Though you've forgotten about your train tracks since then, I haven't forgotten your smile from that day.

When you just turned three years old, and told me you could read and could you show me? I am so glad I didn't say no, Auggie, you know you don't know how to read yet, but instead sat down cross legged in front of you, looking right at you while I listened to every word you read to me.

Even though snow-blowing the driveway is faster, I am so glad I tell you that I don't like the way the snow-blower smells, either, and that I agree, it's much nicer to shovel with you instead. Thank you for your idea to clear the driveway together -- you do do it just as fast. Your little red shovel is almost too small for you now, but I keep it leaning against the garage wall, just in case you ask again.

I hope I never forget how your face lights up when I call your name and tell you that no one scrubs potatoes better than you do, and can you please do the whole bag for us for dinner? You tell me that no one scrubs potatoes the way that you can, and that's the reason why I only call you when that job needs to get done.

Remember when you told me you wanted to have a lemonade stand? In the winter? I'm so glad we figured out a way to have that happen. You made $3.00 that day. The cardboard lemonade stand hasn't been moved from the spot in the basement where we packed it away two years ago.

I thank God that He made me just not care about mud and shoes and wet days, so that when winter turns to a hopeful mushy spring, and you begin to ask if we can go to the classes at our Nature Center, we do. This spring, you surprised me and turned shy and no longer were the little boy pressing his way to the front of the group, the place where you used to always want to be. We've been staying toward the back now, instead; you told me you like it better there.

I laugh when I think of that day we went to the pumpkin farm last fall and you chose a perfectly round but LARGE pumpkin to bring home, and I told you we couldn't, I'd have to carry it for you it was so big. You answered that you knew you could carry it alone. I'm so glad I let you at least try, even though I was sure it was too heavy for you. You know what? You did carry it alone. I think of that lesson often, right before I almost tell you that I don't think you can do something.

Remember that park behind our house, and how every day we'd walk to it? You'd climb up by yourself on this great big boulder and tell me you were climbing to the top of the mountain, Look mama! I'm so glad that when I looked at you, I never told you that  it was only a boulder. It was a mountain... you made it a mountain.

I am so glad that when your dad tells you that he doesn't think you can empty the pool with your splashing alone, that each year you try to show him you can. I don't know what I'll do when the day comes and you turn to him and say no one can empty a pool just by splashing.

I hope that whenever we ride on a sky tram together, just like in this picture, that as soon as we're up in the air and alone, you still quickly grab my hand and turn to me and whisper too loud the way that little boys do, Mom, when we're up here, I can tell you things I don't want brothers to know.  Please, will you always do that? Even when I'm a crooked old lady?

Do you remember the day we painted on the kitchen table with your brothers, and you asked me why I didn't care if some paint spilled? And I told you I didn't know, I just didn't, and you told me it must be because I don't see stuff when we're having fun. I think you're right.

On that day that you watched the movie KungFu Panda two times in a row, and then turned to all of us and announced that you were ready to give kung fu karate lessons for 25 cents each, I'm so glad we had a bowlful of quarters on the kitchen counter. We had lessons up until dinner time.

One day at lunch last summer, you decided that you didn't think you needed to get a cup to drink your juice with your meal, you would just use the hollowed out shell of the watermelon we were having. All I could think to say was, sounds good to me.

When you woke up one morning last winter, you asked me why couldn't we just do home school in the big bed all day? I couldn't think of a reason not to. You ran and got your Transformers pillow, and it was one of the best days I've ever had.

"I think birthdays should start right at the very beginning of a day, just like your life starts right at the very beginning of you,"  you told me. And so, just like that, sunrise birthday parties on your birthday, began.

You've made me so smart, my beautiful little boy, and I've learned so much from you. But out of all that you've taught me, the one lesson that makes my throat so tight that I can hardly swallow, the truest thing I've learned from you, is that only for a golden moment, are the days of waking up to pirates sleeping in my bed, mine.

* * *

When Blogging Has Gone Too Far. Part II of When Someone You Love Has A Blog

Welcome to Part II of  the 3-Part Series, When Someone You Love Has A Blog: When Blogging Has Gone Too Far

In Part I, we discussed how best to communicate with your blogger.

Today's tutorial sadly touches on the all too possible and ugly reality of blogging: when things have gone too far. Part II will cover how to recognize and what to watch for, in the case of your beloved blogger having gone beyond the invisible line of  "too far" in her blogging world.


CAUTION: graphic details ahead, your beloved blogger may not be ready to face many of the following tru-dats. 

As with Part I, Part II is written with LOVE for your blogger in mind. This series is NOT offered as an accusatory finger wagging post to gluestick to your loved blogger's forehead, but as a way to LOVE and KNOW your beloved blogger.

If you are mature and loving and the bigger person in the relationship, then, please, read on, bearing in mind that what you read here may make your stomach flip in recognition. [Stay cool, there's a Part III to come.]

• Do you return home to the sound of taptaptap on a keyboard, after you've been gone with the kids for four hours so she can "get some housework done already", only to find things in the same Hoarder's episode state as whence you first left?
• Are there obvious physical changes that have taken place in your blogger, like the "blogger spread" and the "blogger 15," both centered around the mid and buttocks sections of your blogger's once more firm and exercised body?
• Do you note other undeniable physical findings that include an elevated blood pressure reading, tachycardia, and panting amid cries of  "BLOGGER ATE MY COMMENTS AGAIN!"
• Are you met with a guilty downcast look and stammering when you walk in the door at night and ask your lovely blogger, "So....what did you do today?"
• Does your blogger fall asleep during any attempt to watch a movie on family movie night, or fall face down into her evening meal in a dead snore by a fatigue so severe that it can only be brought on by choosing blogging over sleep? For the third night this week. (so I've heard...)
• Are the children being told to just turn their underwear inside out and wear it that way it won't kill them, until she has a chance to get to the laundry, as she promised she would earlier in the week last Tuesday.
• Have the children been heard to complain of symptoms of light headedness and seeing dark spots swim before their eyes as their blood sugar has dropped, awaiting lunch for "just give me 5 more minutes to tweak this post a bit."
• Has there been a reduction in the Visa/Mastercard balance since online and outside shopping have fallen by the wayside. TREAD CAREFULLY HERE: your joy at the plummeting Visa bill may mask your awareness of what is truly happening: your beloved blogger no longer participating in activities that once filled her time.
• Questionable Personal Hygiene. Yes, the ugliest side of blogging. Has your blogger chosen blogging over daily basic human cleanliness. Yes, Shower Skipping.  Yes, "dirty blogging." Do you have days where your beloved blogger states they just haven't "had the chance to get in the shower." 
• Are mealtimes occurring at later and later times? Does your blogger enthusiastically decide that "we'll all eat European tonight, at 10 PM, won't that be fun?" Do not be astounded at these attempts at rationalization.
• Are you told to "leave a comment" if you happen to disagree on a subject?
• Have your children been heard to say, "Wow, mommy, I forgot your eyes were blue, it's been so long since I've seen them?" 
• Is blogging beginning to take its toll and cause wear and tear on your blogger's body as in, your blogger needs to seek medical treatment for the all too common "blogger's pinched shoulder"   and "blogger's clawhand" that now surrounds the mouse.
• In Real Life interactions with offline folk, are your blogger's conversations peppered with "OMG!", or "LOL",  "hashtag mamaneedssomewine",  "thanks for the shout out" and "happy friday follow!"
• Do your family's phone messages look like this: "@Tommy called" or "remember to pick up Sam, address www.1341 Linden St.com."
• Have you had "cereal for dinner " more than 3 times this week, all the while your lovely blogger reassuring you that "the kids LOVE to have cereal for dinner! Right, kids?"
• Does your blogger find it incredibly mouth agape unfathomable and refuse to believe that offline people DO NOT actually know who The Bloggess,  Dooce, and  The Pioneer Woman are?! 

There are many more possible "red flags." These are the most commonly reported. Please realize that confrontation will result in more rationalization.

DO NOT use the words "addicted" and "out of control."

What your blogger does online is important to her. It takes time to visit, comment, post, visit back, respond to comments. Without knowing the extent of the amount of time that state of the art blogging takes, you are NOT the person to make a judgment call because you do not know how very important it is for me to get back to my commenters and I'm way behind and I don't like that feeling and this is important so I think the kids can have cereal again tonight......umm, I mean, walk a mile in a blogger's shoes. (No,  THAT there was NOT rationalization....interaction is vital to one's blog).

This series on loving your blogger is prepared solely for the purpose of loving your blogger.

If I hear any complaints about this information being used against a blogger in the form of humiliation or printed format being lorded and waved over their heads in abnormally raised tones of voices, then you will not see  Part III: "Re-Introducing Your Blogger Back Into Society."

Don't blow it, if you want to see Part III, tread carefully. Because the blogging world is a small world, we're a loyal bunch, and I'll know in the instant it takes to hit "Post Comment." 

Do the right thing: love your blogger.

I've Got Numbers 1 and 4 Covered

When You Feel Like a Raging Failure...

I subscribe to IttyBiz for so many reasons. Naomi, one of the writers there, is a HUGE reason.


The post she has there today, "When you feel like a raging failure," is one you must go and read.

Just hearing,  "you're not alone", is sometimes all you need to hear.

Yeah, it's been that kind of week for me, and this post here was Exactly what I needed to land in my lap.

Timeless. You'll love it. (The last paragraph is the best.)

I Was At BlogHer '10?? Yes, Thanks to The Next Martha

Turns out I did make it to BlogHer '10...

Thanks to SweetMercifulCrap , when hopping over there today, I saw the image above:  thank you for providing the picture here of the Martha Shirt that we all  rode in on to NYC.

THANK YOU to THENEXTMARTHA for taking us along to BlogHer '10 on the Martha shirt.

Tell me, did we have fun? I know we sat and had lunch across from Jessica Bern....

Taming Insanity: From The Vaults Edition

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.....................

Look what KLZ's mom sent me..............................

Taming Insanity in her sweet yout'

Had to dust a little Cheetos dust off the picture (thank goodness the rats spared it (wink)).....

MarthaPoints? You mean DadPoints by Baby E.

Monday: Baby E posts, which is great for me, for him, for Mondays in general. MarthaPoints, the awesome blog, gave him the idea to use her system of MarthaPoints on his own dad for DadPoints. (hmmmmmmm...he is counting on these posts more and more as a venting source..mea culpa totally).
Here's the review of Baby E's week, in his words:

MarthaPoints
My mom saves the blogs I can read for when we read blogs together. MarthaPoints is a blog we do together that she likes a lot. The other day when we were reading it, I said, "Martha Points? I'm going to blog about Dad Points."  And I think this is a good idea, because my dad is always getting points and losing points. Sometimes right away together. Like today, he woke up and made us pancakes, so he got Dadpoints for that. But then he made us do yardwork, so he lost all his DadPoints then.

I told him that, too. And I'm going to keep doing it, too.

The Family Bike Rides
Yes! It's been too hot this week to do family bike rides. I'm doing my backwards robot dance while I tell you this right now....

The Pool Here
Where we live, we have a pool in our town. It's a big pool with 3 slides and a diving board. We have a family pass, so we can go all the time. My dad takes us at night and on the weekends. I like to go. Except now the lifeguards know my name and say, "Baby E., WALK!" That is so embarrassing cuz they just don't say it, they use the MEGAPHONE and the WHOLE pool looks to see who is getting yelled at. I can't say hate, so I say I don't like that a lot.

Family Movie Night
One of the blogs my mom follows, Scraps of Life--the 64 arts,  told her about a good movie for us to see. It was called Flight of The Navigator. It was old, and the music was old, but my mom said that if it became too painful to watch, we wouldn't have to. But it was good right away. It's old, so you have to give it a chance to like it. But me and my brothers liked it. I thought I was going to have to pray that it was over, but I didn't.

Karate Kid
This movie was awesome! I wish I could do karate kung fu for one day. I would be so awesome. I can't practice in the house, I have to do that outside, which I don't like to because of the wasps and bees. I practice in my head right before I wake up.

Loopholes
This is how my dad loses A LOT of DadPoints. He finds loopholes. I don't like that. He'll say, "you can get on the computer when I'm done." So I say OK. And then he never gets done. And then he says, " I said when I was done."  And that's a loophole.

My New Tooth
My new front tooth is coming in. You can see it. It looks like a big piece of sideways rice. A really BIG piece of it. I don't like that becuz it scares me that my whole mouth is going to be filled with big RICE teeth and I don't like the way that looks in my head to me for my future. My mom says my face will grow with my teeth so I won't look scary.

Great America 
We still have 2 summer trips yet. One is to Great America and the other is to The Renaissance Faire. I love The Renaissance Faire. The whole place is pretend, including the people. That is the funniest part. It's funny becuz it makes my dad crabby to go, but he goes. The pretend village people there follow him around and bother him and my mom told him it's becuz they can tell he is a grump and that is what makes it funny when they bother him. Like this one time a BIG skinny tall man who was grown up and dressed like a brown baby fawn followed my dad around on tiptoes and kept trying to sniff his hand and stuff and that made my dad SO MAD.  It made my mom laugh so hard she was crying.

And this other time, cuz we go every year as my wish, this BIG tall BIG strong man dressed like a knight followed my dad around and offered my dad some stuff for my mom. And then challenged him to a duel sword fight for my mom and my dad laughed about it the first little while then when the man who was so big kept following my dad around asking for my mom for some trade of stuff, then my dad said, "Alright, joke's over."

That's what makes going there the funnest.
My dad is fun.

Bye.

Me at my town's pool. I go in the deep end.  See my rice tooth?


On a serious note: please click over to In Pursuit of Martha Points to join up in an awesome blogging venture to raise funds and awareness for a significant cause that affects everyone.   One of the coolest ways I've seen to raise money and  awareness, right here. 

THANK YOU!!!

Eclectic/Eccentric

Trish, the bibliophile

I have looked forward to Guest Posting today for Trisha, of Eclectic/ Eccentric,  where she blogs on book and film reviews. As her tagline reads, she is "An eccentric professor who reads and reviews an eclectic mix of books."

Trisha is a professor who has an exceptional book and movie review blog. Her writing style is warm and current, and she reviews books across every type of genre. When you click over, what you'll find is a blog well organized, listing books and films she's reviewed since 2007. Her rating system is simple and so clever:

A-A-B-B. Avoid, Acceptable, Borrow, and Buy!

Since both Trish and I  go through books like popcorn, of course, our paths had to cross. You will love her blog, and meeting her. A visit there is something so different.

At Trisha's today, I ask how  blogging has, if it has, affected your book reading life. How do you keep your reading life alive with blogging? Please let me know at  Trisha's Eclectic/Eccentric.


Hope to see you, and Thank You! 

When Why You Began Blogging Turns Into Why You Keep Blogging

On February 27, 2010, my family stood behind me while I pushed "Publish Post." I remember sweating palms, a tingling scalp, and excitement that I hadn't felt in years.

I remember the 4 men that I live with shouting "Yeah! Mom! You did it!"  I remember all my boys saying, "I can't believe you did it, Mom!"

I remember the women who encouraged me to start my own blog, Naomi, Jessica, Suzy, Ellen, Shari, Daphne.   I had commented on all their blogs, and each had told me I had said enough in the little boxes to continue on my own. Thank you.

I began blogging out of a need that I've always, always felt: to write. To read.

What I never expected, what I never anticipated, would be part of this whole, huge, new, prism to my life, was this:

Thank you, Tarja, from The Flying Chalupa. They're beautiful!

Why I began blogging has turned into why I keep blogging. Tarja of The Flying Chalupa, is one reason. There are 453 other reasons why I keep blogging in the small boxes with the pictures to the right. These are the people that have become part of my life now. 

I love you, Tarja. Thank you, more than my feeble attempts at the right words can ever say. I hope you feel what I'm trying to tell you from way over here. And thank you, to all of you, on the right. You don't know how you've changed my life, but you have. You have become the reasons I keep blogging.  

Thank you to each of you for visiting, commenting, reading, following, caring.  

Sorry, Tarja, and all of you, nothing funny here today. You all have me counting my blessings, feeling so dang lucky, and have left me pretty misty eyed right now.

Thank you.So.Very.Much. 453 times.

Mad Skillz with a Z and I know Suzy Soro

Mondays are Baby E's post days. He is really looking forward to this one. He said, in anger over one of his favorite activities...the forced family bike ride, "I can't wait to blog about this!!!"

My Mad Skills
I have mad computer skills with a Z.  So, I am ultra powered at the game of helping my mom do things on the computer. Like, she..I..I mean, she, took pictures for the computer for some pictures she needs for Suzy Soro, who is this funny lady we know, who is superfunny to my mom, and nice to me. She sent me a T shirt, so we want to send her some pictures, and NO ONE knew how to do anything with the pictures..not my mom, or my brothers, only I did. So, I did...and everyone was like, "wow..baby e...how do you know this?" I just use my common sense.

Also, for my mad skillZ I have them in other parts, too, like in swimming.

My mom gets excited when Suzy Soro does a new post.

Suzy Soro is super famous and I can't believe she sent me a T shirt.Thank you!

My Mad Skills Part II
I have mad skills in swimming. From like 7 or 8 ft deep I brought a ten TEN ten pound rubber diving brick up to the surface. It's ten pounds and nobody else in my entire class, even a 12 year old, could not do it. That's why it's a mad skill. People's mouths go open.

My Mad Skills Continue
I started soccer again. And my Mad Skillz were on fire there, too. I have soccer on Mondays and Wednesdays.

Today Was So Scary Hot
I always make my family laugh. I just talk and say what the words say and they laugh. Like today, we went to a  air quotes family outing. And this happened. It was so dang hot. We all wanted to be in the pool but my mom had an idea for a family outing instead. So, we went to ..what else... hello? a museum. On a HOT demented day. And so we were walking to get there and we had to drive an hour to get there, and we were walking and I screamed and looked down at my legs and said, "aaaaaaaaaaaaaah! It feels like blood is running down my legs," so I had to look, and it was just sweat. I had that much sweat running down my legs. I thought I was going to look down and see blood, it felt like that. My family laughed. But that's what it felt like. Didn't anyone else feel that?


A Blogger Award
Stephanie, the DramaMama ( I like to say that) from Scoop on Poop ( I like to say that, too) gave me a Sunshine Award. Thank you, Stephanie!...the dramamama...

My Favorite CD
My favorite music CD is a science one. It has so many cool science songs. Like "Here comes Science" and "Not a gas, not a liquid, not a solid" and "The sun is a mass of incandescent gas" and "Why does the sun shine?"

I love that CD. It's called Here Comes Science by They Might Be Giants. It's called "Here Comes Science."

Levels Of Power
There are basically 3 levels of power that I use.  I have Ferocious Power, Sheer Power, and Magic Powers. The weakest one is Magic Power, that one comes first. Sheer power is next. And the strongest is Ferocious. That one is just like Mad Skillz only it's magical. Mad Skillz is just stuff I know. Oh, yeah, there's Super Special Powers, but that's really close to Mad Skillz, only a little bit better.

I don't have control over any of them. When I have these powers, it feels like the 4th of July Fireworks. Crack! Pow!

The Family Bike Ride
Trust me, you don't want to know about this one. The mosquitoes were so bad! I almost lost control of my bike and they were attacking me so bad but still my dad wouldn't stop and I almost died from losing control trying to wave off the mosquitoes and could've crashed but my dad didn't care. We STILL had to do the family bike ride!

Skype
I wish you guys would go on skype so you could see me do my super cool new dance I made up with my own sound effects. Prrrrrrrrrrrrp...ch..ch..ch..ch...Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrp....

Suzy Soro sent me this awesome T shirt that I love

Suzy Soro is famous. Like, really famous. She can make my dad laugh, and only I can do that.  I can't believe I know her.

Thank you!!


My First Tweet
I sent my first TWEET today! To The Next Martha at The Martha Project. She brought home a HEXBUG for her son from BlogHer and I had to warn them NOW and FAST how fragile that toy is. It's fun but breaks fast.
And E-Z.

Bye!

 
 

Mamapedia Post Today

I know it's Day 3 of Stay-At-Home BlogHer '10, and I do have my final closing remarks set up for us BUT BUT BUT I just found out that a post I submitted to mamapedia is published there today.

If you've ever wondered how we became homeschoolers, but felt it was too personal a question to ask, because you're all about the manners here when you come to the castle, then here's the post for you.

Please stop over and see the wonderful community of informative and thought-provoking contributors that make up mamapedia. If it's your first visit there, it'll go on your daily blogroll.

Thank you so much, and think of all those poor, poor tired BlogHer ladies, while we are home just beaming with radiant, well rested skin, and bright eyes lookin' all fresh from the sleep we've had. In our own beds. With no roomies. Or worries of bedbugs.

Ahhhhhh, don't we look good today!.....hope to see you at  mamapedia!

Wendi Aarons: Day 2 of SAH BlogHer '10: You're Invited To A Party!

Welcome to DAY 2 of Stay-At-Home BlogHer '10!

Today, a party invite for us! and it's the Best BlogHer '10 party invite ev-er!

 Beyond funny Wendi Aarons has put a BlogHer '10 xtranormal video together at the Mouthy Housewives website, that will make you squeeeee. And you're invited!!

Day 2 of Stay-At-Home BlogHer '10, we will click over here.

Seriously, you have to see this. Trust me.


And I do think you're all like angels, only skinnier. Come laugh, hard, over here. (see, we ARE having fun)

**************************************************
NEWS! Just learned in the most pleasant awesome surprise to wake up to, that Good Day Regular People is the featured blog at Lady Bloggers Society. Thank you, Stepfanie, Dalia, and Amy. What a joy and honor to be featured today. If you're meeting me for the first time, here is a link to the fave posts at Good Day.
THANK YOU, LBS!!  
LBS  is a great place to meet new friends, learn, and it's like stopping in for coffee with your friends before you begin your day. If you haven't been to Lady Bloggers yet, stop over, it is a lot of fun and is my first blog stop in the morning.  

The Flying Chalupa as BlogHer '10 SAH Opening Speaker

Welcome to the BlogHer '10 Stay-At-Home Event!


Today, kicking off our weekend of SAH planned events, we will click here for our Keynote Speaker, Tarja, of The Flying Chalupa. Tarja will introduce us all to the depths of the world of the blogger, and from hence we came.

Please, let's all click over and welcome Tarja, reading from her keynote address, "The Blorax." 

Evil Clouds

It seems like such a long time since Baby E was up for his Monday  posts. Summers are like that, they toss routine up in the air. It's Monday, and Baby E is back. With pleasure, here he is:


Today was the worst day I ever had.
My mom was the meanest lady ever today. She likes to be mean. I bet she was mean as a kid, too. She likes to not let me do what I want. I had my worst day ever because of her. Totally the worst day ever. I only got to do computer time once. And I had the family bike ride AGAIN. And she made me super mad because she was "you have to go on the bike ride" and then dad said, for the icing on the cake, "you have to play soccer." This was after the bike ride! Even though I like soccer, it was so mean to make me do exercise. I think that I don't get to do Nintendo, or PS 2 or computer time enough.  I know FOR A FACT that other kids do more computer time! She is like an evil cloud on like when you see them on cartoons.


My Cousin was here.
And, also, my cousin was visiting us this week. He is one of us like a brother. I miss him already, but we play games on skype together.

The worst day I ever had again.
I wanna keep talking about this. The worst day, ever. It all started when mom gave me 50cents and if I got one little ping pong ball into the bowl at the fair here this week I would get a hermit crab. I tried over and over, though only twice, though that still is over and over, and guess what? You'll never believe it but the ping pong ball ..but... the ping pong ball WENT INSIDE the bowl and BOUNCED OUT!!! [mom, please do 3 exclamation marks] and the carnival worker guy did not let it count!!! Oh, yeah, it's like I couldn't believe he wouldn't let me win. My mouth dropped to the floor, the ground , I mean. I am not going to play a game at the fair again. Well, actually, I might. My point is that they have it rigged so no one will win. I told him, "but it went in!!!" He said, "sorry...you have to try again."

Good News.
Yes! Soccer starts again today. I love that.

Tricks.
Here are some tricks I like to play on my mom. I like to fake knock on the front door and run. Then she opens the door and no one is there and I can see her do it and it makes me laugh and she says, "Baby Eeeeeeeeeee!" [mom, put a lot of eeeee's in there....] I also like to give my half eaten popsicles to my dad to finish fast so I can see what the joke is.  Is that not really a trick, is it? My last trick is I like to roll myself up in the covers on the floor when my mom makes the bed, and she thinks I'm somewhere else and then she steps on me and I yell and say, "OWWWW!" and yell and she feels bad she stepped on me.

Stuff I like to do with my dad.
First of all, I DO NOT like family bike rides. I DO like to watch this cool new show called "Wipe Out" with him. This is the best show ever. It is so funny. Me and my dad watch it together. These crazy people do crazy obstacles. Your kids would love it. The best part is that  the winner gets 50,000 dollars!!! It is like an epic battle to the finish with all the crazy people.  People think it is impossible to beat but one person always ends up winning "50 grand" that's what they call dollars on the show. My mom takes the fun out by saying, "someone is going to get hurt." But that is why it is funny, they fall.

Cool Stuff.
Before, and this is a true story, but before we walked into our county fair this weekend, I said to my mom, " I wonder if anyone will recognize me from the newspaper article", and then someone did! They said, "hey, we saw you in the paper." It was awesome.

Bye.