It seems like such a long time since Baby E was up for his Monday posts. Summers are like that, they toss routine up in the air. It's Monday, and Baby E is back. With pleasure, here he is:
Today was the worst day I ever had.
My mom was the meanest lady ever today. She likes to be mean. I bet she was mean as a kid, too. She likes to not let me do what I want. I had my worst day ever because of her. Totally the worst day ever. I only got to do computer time once. And I had the family bike ride AGAIN. And she made me super mad because she was "you have to go on the bike ride" and then dad said, for the icing on the cake, "you have to play soccer." This was after the bike ride! Even though I like soccer, it was so mean to make me do exercise. I think that I don't get to do Nintendo, or PS 2 or computer time enough. I know FOR A FACT that other kids do more computer time! She is like an evil cloud on like when you see them on cartoons.
My Cousin was here.
And, also, my cousin was visiting us this week. He is one of us like a brother. I miss him already, but we play games on skype together.
The worst day I ever had again.
I wanna keep talking about this. The worst day, ever. It all started when mom gave me 50cents and if I got one little ping pong ball into the bowl at the fair here this week I would get a hermit crab. I tried over and over, though only twice, though that still is over and over, and guess what? You'll never believe it but the ping pong ball ..but... the ping pong ball WENT INSIDE the bowl and BOUNCED OUT!!! [mom, please do 3 exclamation marks] and the carnival worker guy did not let it count!!! Oh, yeah, it's like I couldn't believe he wouldn't let me win. My mouth dropped to the floor, the ground , I mean. I am not going to play a game at the fair again. Well, actually, I might. My point is that they have it rigged so no one will win. I told him, "but it went in!!!" He said, "sorry...you have to try again."
Good News.
Yes! Soccer starts again today. I love that.
Tricks.
Here are some tricks I like to play on my mom. I like to fake knock on the front door and run. Then she opens the door and no one is there and I can see her do it and it makes me laugh and she says, "Baby Eeeeeeeeeee!" [mom, put a lot of eeeee's in there....] I also like to give my half eaten popsicles to my dad to finish fast so I can see what the joke is. Is that not really a trick, is it? My last trick is I like to roll myself up in the covers on the floor when my mom makes the bed, and she thinks I'm somewhere else and then she steps on me and I yell and say, "OWWWW!" and yell and she feels bad she stepped on me.
Stuff I like to do with my dad.
First of all, I DO NOT like family bike rides. I DO like to watch this cool new show called "Wipe Out" with him. This is the best show ever. It is so funny. Me and my dad watch it together. These crazy people do crazy obstacles. Your kids would love it. The best part is that the winner gets 50,000 dollars!!! It is like an epic battle to the finish with all the crazy people. People think it is impossible to beat but one person always ends up winning "50 grand" that's what they call dollars on the show. My mom takes the fun out by saying, "someone is going to get hurt." But that is why it is funny, they fall.
Cool Stuff.
Before, and this is a true story, but before we walked into our county fair this weekend, I said to my mom, " I wonder if anyone will recognize me from the newspaper article", and then someone did! They said, "hey, we saw you in the paper." It was awesome.
Bye.
I think those carnival games are rigged like that to make it hard for you to win! It's not fair, is it?
ReplyDeleteLove the pic of you and your mom!
How cute are you!!! I didn't know you wrote on here as well. I know the games are rigged. Which sucks but they say that is how they make money. But there is a secret to each one. When I was a teenager I helped tear a carnival down. We got paid to tear down booths and rides. Did you know there are 752 pars to a Tilt a Whirl? Yeah neither did I until we had to take it down. I am glad I don't work for a fair.. I would hate to put up and take all those machines down each week. That would get old after a while.
ReplyDelete" I know FOR A FACT that other kids do more computer time!"
ReplyDeleteThis must be international FACT !!!!
Given that I hear it on a regular basis LOL.
I HATE carni's. They smell like cabbage. Carnivals are so rigged! Stick with cotton candy and elephant ears next time:)
ReplyDeleteThere is never enough tv or computer time in our house either. One of life's great injustices obviously.
ReplyDeleteBaby E. You're lucky your parents make you do sports. If they didn't make you do sports and you just stayed in front of the computer, you would start to get fat. At first just a little fat. But then you wouldn't be able to get out of the armchair and you'd have to walk around the living room with the chair stuck to your backside. And then you wouldn't be able to leave the house because the chair didn't fit through the door. And then when EVERYONE YOU KNOW was at the fair winning hermit crabs, you would be sitting on that armchair, staring out the window watching them all come home holding their new hermit crabs and just crying.
ReplyDeleteSo you're lucky to do family bike rides.
The jokes he plays on your are too funny! I am seeing my future...with two boys I am sure they will play lots of tricks on me!
ReplyDeleteWe're big fans of Wipeout around here, too. My girls like to do Wipeout-esque stunts when we're up at the lake, which makes me beyond nervous.
ReplyDeleteLOL! What a FUN post! And we love to watch Wipe OUt here too! lol! I think the hosts are more entertaining then the contestants sometimes.
ReplyDeleteMy eleven year old son wants his dad to be one of the crazy wipe out people. And the freaky part, my husband would be really good at it!
ReplyDeleteHope the Carny's don't trick you again!
OMG, he is sooo funny! I love him, "Mom, please put three exclamation points".
ReplyDeleteYeah, fair games are always rigged. Stupid, liar games!
The tough life of Baby E! Such a cute pic!
ReplyDeleteSomebody has waaay too many silly bands. If you put that many on both arms, you'll soon have arms like a gorilla with all that weightlifting.
ReplyDeleteTrust me on the stuff your parents make you do... you will look back and appreciate it.
Now now, Baby E. Go easy on your mom. I have it on good authority that I am actually the meanest lady ever : )
ReplyDeleteYou are right about the fair games, big rip-off and Thanks for letting me know about Wipe Out. That sounds like a show that would be popular at my house!
Empress, it sounds like you are ruling your kingdom with an iron fist!! :)
ReplyDeletePeople recognizing him for the article has to be SO cool! Go baby E!
I swear those carnival games are rigged! I never win either!
ReplyDeleteI love Wipe Out too. The big red balls get me every time.
ReplyDeleteGreat post.
I'm really surprised CPS hasn't been called by now. Computer time only once?!?
ReplyDeleteI always love your posts! Would you believe that two of my son's friends tried out to be on Wipe Out? They didn't make it through to the show, but they wanted to!
ReplyDeleteMy sons used to like to fake me out like you do your mom. Scared me to death! They found a rubber rat and really got their aunt with it once.
Love your spirit here! So good to hear from you again!
Next time they jib you at the fair, through the other ping pong ball at the guy's head (don't let your mom see that, our secret, shhh). LOL. Enjoy the bike rides now because when you are old, if you don't exercise now, your knees will crack when you walk . . . . like mine :)
ReplyDeleteThat is such a sweet picture of you two!
ReplyDeleteEmpress does he know about the second pair of eyes we mothers have?
ReplyDeletetoo funny! I didn't know your son contributes to your blog.
ReplyDeleteOkay, I have to say, the mean mom thing made me laugh a LOT. You know those kids who get tons of computer time? They can't ride bikes or play soccer because they're so fat and lazy. They just have to roll like Violet Beauregard. No bike, just roll on their fat. Your mom is protecting you from becoming Baby E. Beauregard. Now, go hug her and tell her you love her. The fair thing stinks. I would have been mad, too.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great picture!
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with how they rig the games at the fair. Grrrr. It's not fair at all. Have you seen 'Despicable Me'? I love, love, love the scene where the little girl FINALLY wins a stuffed unicorn.
'Wipe Out' is our favorite show right now. My 4 year old son just laughs and laughs when people fall into the mud or fall off the bouncing balls. Priceless.
awesome pic Baby E...and I do hope your mom is a little "nicer" to you this week!!!!!! :)
ReplyDeleteI bet I could top your mom for making worst days ever. My 11 year old doesn't play any type of video games here, and he is allowed 45 minutes of computer time each day. That's it. Unless it is for school work. How's that for mean?!?
ReplyDeleteAlso, we are only allowed dessert one night a week here, and we do PLENTY of exercise. So, my little friend...it could always be worse.
This was great, Baby E. I really missed your post last week. I seriously giggled at how you roll yourself into her bed covers so she steps on you. That's funny. You really shouldn't make her feel bad like that, but it is funny. ;)
ReplyDeleteCould you please tell your mom I have something for her at my place?
I don't like that show Wipeout either. Guess I'm an old fuddy duddy.
ReplyDeleteI loved this!!!
ReplyDeleteOh Baby E, if you were our friend in real life you could start a blog with my kids ALL ABOUT the mean-spirited parents (mostly moms) in your lives! Never enough time to do what they want, especially the video games....and they don't like the family bike ride, either!
ReplyDeleteLove "Wipe Out", too, but nobody in our family is coordinated enough to be on it!
Adorable.
ReplyDeleteMy first Baby E post...LOVE it! And Wipe Out is our favorite show, too!
ReplyDeleteYay, Baby E is back! And you do know that you have a really super cool mom, don't you? I mean after all she typed out all that stuff you said about her being so mean...I'll bet she's pretty sweet underneath that tough mean outer Mom shell, huh?!
ReplyDeleteThat is such an adorable photo of the two of you. Your mom is mean because she loves you, Baby E. You're lucky to have her.
ReplyDeleteI knew Wipe Out was designed for kids around the age of Baby E. It explains why my husband loves it so.
ReplyDeleteYou are such a mean, fabulous mom, Empress.
ReplyDeleteAnd Baby E, my girls play the ring and run game on me all the time and every single time it fools me.
Great post, as usual, Baby E.
Arrrgh! think my post got eaten. I'll say it again.
ReplyDeleteEmpress, you are such a mean, fabulous mom.
Baby E, my girls play the ring and run game on me all the time and I fall for it every time.
Great post, as usual.
I love that Baby E posts on your blog! So great to hear his perspective.
ReplyDeleteAnd to Baby E - I know computer time is fun, but someday you'll be healthier and smarter than those kids who had more computer time than you. Your parents are giving you the best start at life!
Carnival games are totally rigged. But, one day, you might actually look back and discover those family bike rides were awesome. Just sayin'.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great story! or stories, I should say!
ReplyDeletecarnival games are dangerous. My GD won a goldfish 7 years ago and the darn thing is now about 8 inches long and as fat as can be. We've had to buy 4 aquariums for him, each one bigger than the last. He won't stop growing...
Baby E, does your mom ever say to you like my dad says to me "I don't care what other kids do, I care what YOU do?"
ReplyDeleteMan, I did not like that.
My kids love telling me how much more time their friends get on electronics than I allow them to have. Goes in one ear on me and out the other:)
ReplyDeleteLove that picture!
ReplyDeleteBaby E! Family bike rides are THE BEST! Can I come? We could play cool "I-spy" games and see who could go fastest. Can you ride without your hands yet? Your mom probably won't like that. Mine didn't.
ReplyDeleteAww! That is a beautiful picture! and Baby E, dear boy, your Mum is a smart woman!
ReplyDeletee,
ReplyDeletesorry i am way late today. it has been a long day. i had to work today and i woud have rather been playing PS2 as well...my boys and i play star wars lego (1 & 2) it is our favorite game. we have to limit their time as well (and mine too)
yesterday we went to the waterfalls, and beow the large one was a small one that sloped down like a slide so we sid down it into the pool of water. the boys & i had a blast. the thing is to get there we had to hike almost a mile...if we would not have exercised we would never have had fun.
its your family too. one day you will get big and have your own place and some days you will wish mom cooked for you.
sorry about the carnival games. they do set them up so it is really hard to win. maybe you will win next time.
glad they recognized you. smiles.
b
All moms are mean Baby E. That's our job. But I promise we do it with only the best intentions. LOVE the picture of you and your mom. :)
ReplyDeleteOh! I love Wipeout!! And so do all of my boys. My fave part is when they crash on the big red bouncy balls. Hilarious!
ReplyDeleteLOL I simply must start family bike rides!(and make them madatory) Love it!
ReplyDeleteYou are gorgeous and also----look at that Silly Bandz collection! My girls would be soooo jealous! Baby E, you are so blessed to have the mama you do. You have no idea!
ReplyDeleteHow I love him.
ReplyDeleteIf I mailed Baby E a hermit crab, I'm thinking that might not have a happy ending. I sure would like to though... Perhaps a lobster would travel better.
I love the photo of you and your mom, Baby E. I was just telling my kid about those cheap fair games and how they are designed to be a cheat. Don't play them. My son thought he could throw a bouncy ball into a basket and it kept rebounding right out of that basket and he cried.
ReplyDeletePeople falling down is good comedy. Worst day ever doesn't sound too bad though. Someday you will appreciate the bike rides and soccer games. Computer time is way overrated. :)
ReplyDeleteDearest Baby E, you should come and live with me. I would let you play XBOX and computer all day as long as you didn't bug me to play with you. Your mother has such a fun and outgoing spirit that I'm not at all surprised that she likes playing with her children, and although I don't begrudge her this, I would never join in with her, no matter how much I STILL love her. She's a darling, and you are so lucky that she is your mother. And you're pretty darn tootin' cute yourself!
ReplyDeleteOh my, Baby E is so cute! I'm sure he would not like that I called him that:) My husband loves that wipeout show and I'm like your mom...I'm always saying, "wow, they're going to get hurt"...gotta be a guy thing, my husband cracks up at it. You're a pretty good trickster Baby E...pretty good.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I literally LOL'd- especially at the tricks part. :)
ReplyDeleteThe Empress doesn't disappoint by continuing to ruin lives with (GASP) family bike rides! The nerve of this mom, we should organize to rescue Baby E!
ReplyDeleteToo funny!!! <--I'll add extra for Baby E. So great he's back at it.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes, us 'mean moms' who make our kids play outside. *gasp* How dare we? I do feel sad that he didn't win his crab though. Fairs are a great way to teach kids that life isn't always fair.
So nice to have you back this week, Baby E:) And yeah, your mom's not that mean, she just wants to keep you healthy & active. My mom used to make us play outside all day during the summer - no TV or anything - now that's mean!
ReplyDeleteLove the picture of you & your Mom:)
Oh, Baby E, those carnival games are ALL RIGGED! You wuz robbed.
ReplyDeleteAnd I just love love love your posts. Don't ever give them up or skip them, okay?
This is SO funny. I love the perspective from Baby E.
ReplyDeleteI love the picture. I am one of those mean moms too.
ReplyDeleteMy son, Jackson, loves to watch Wipeout with his dad, too.
ReplyDeleteI love the picture!
I'm glad I got to see a picture and put faces to the names!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree with you, E - the games at the fairs are rigged. Plain and simple. You should have won a hermit crab!
Ms. Empress - thank you for stopping over by my blog; it's always a pleasure! If you ever travel thru central Minnesota [haha rightt!], we'll traipse around the idyllic Midwest together. Deal? :)
I love these posts. Your son is adorable and he is such a good writer! It's just fun to see how they perceive things. His interpretation of a bike ride and soccer as being the meanest thing you could do to him is just hilarious.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on being featured on Lady Bloggers today.
I like watching Wipe Out too. It guaranteed to make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteI totally get the bike ride thing. I always feel super sore and tired after I am finished. Just think, if you did not go on them, you could not complain about them, and that is the best part.
ReplyDeleteHahah, this is adorably hilarious!
ReplyDeleteThe Wipe Out show... yea, I have to admit that I, too, giggle when they fall. ;)
Linds
I love this picture! You both look really good! Thanks for the encouragement on my blog - Lord knows I really needed it! Your blog is always so creative, inspiring and fun.
ReplyDelete