Day 2 of Shake It Like It's Your Blogoversary |
It was beyond sweet and wonderful to read your comments from yesterday. Thank you.
I'm printing that stuff OUT and folding it up nice and tight and carrying it with me in my breast pocket to pull out and read whenever anyone tries to tell me I'm NOT all that. Like at the post office. Oh, yes, I am--all that, and pulling it out.
I might just laminate it, too, and tape it to my dashboard. Yes. That would be cool.
Today, during weekaversary, I am celebrating my very first guest post. It was for LOL., and ran on April 23, 2010. I WAS SO PROUD.
The post was called, "Hasten, Children, The Hour is Nigh," and I had SO MUCH fun writing it. Here it is:
Me: “Children, 'tis morning! get thee down, do not be as fools!”
2nd Oldest: “What is she talking about now?”
Oldest: *sigh* I think she wants us up and downstairs for breakfast.”
Baby E: “Do we have to come down already, Mom?”
Me: “Hast thou not heard my words? Do ye not hear? That I have had need to raise my voice to you, yet you have not quickened your step? You think that all is well, but I have asked you to complete the task assigned unto you—and yet it is to be seen!”
Oldest: “Alright, Mom, we’re coming down….but we have off today, and all week, remember?”
Me: “Off? It is slovenliness! You speak of slovenliness! I have not languished in my bed, and yet I am renewed of strength and spirit! I strike while the hour is present, I have shown you this ten times by ten times, so you may see it as truth. But you still have no faith in my ways!”
Baby E: "Mom, I don’t want to have breakfast now. I want to just stay upstairs and play with my Legos for awhile first. We're off, Mom.”
Me: “Laughter? Play? You shall hear neither until our tasks are done on this day. And when your stomach cramps with hunger, then where shall you look for what was once laid before you? No, child, no, I warn you to be careful of which master you choose to serve.”
2nd Oldest: “We’d better go downstairs, I know her.... she won’t stop.”
Me: “Do my sons refuse their mother? Is it because I am a simple woman? Is it because I do not strike fear in your heart? No, it is not fear that I want you to act upon, but love….yes! love, for what else is there for me to give? Children, come, come! That I may quench thy thirst, and warm your bellies with that which I have labored to set before you.”
2nd Oldest: “*sigh* Don’t tell me, let me guess, Mom’s been staying up late watching The Ten Commandments again.”
Oldest: “Yup. Easter time.”
Me: “Come, my oldest, for my love for you is stronger than any fierce wrath which you may have, O my teenage son. Come to me, all my sons, arise! to greet a day, let us go forth, let the trumpets sound! and let us surrender our hearts to the treasures of a day of which we have never seen!
The Caravan awaits to take us to our journey. We must go with all speed!”
Baby E: “Does that mean we're supposed to get in the van? Guys?”
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I was so excited to be featured at my friend, Robin's, site, Laugh Out Loud. She was one of the very first bloggers I met. If you'd like to be part of the all star line-up of the best of the sit-down comedians at LOL, send your funny post or story to laffylady@gmail.com. If you're featured, then you can proudly have the LOL button up on your blog, too. I hope you try it.
See you tomorrow for more of weekaversary! And, thank you for being here with me this week, and celebrating. There'd be no party without you.
Yay!! Happy Blogthday!!
ReplyDeleteOh my! You made me realize I blew right through my own blogoversary, and didn't even get myself anything. I may have to give myself the silent treatment.
ReplyDeletethat was one of my faves!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE that movie too!! So funny. You. You are fabulous. Happy Day2 to you! :)
ReplyDeleteXOXO
I totally remember reading this on LOL!
ReplyDeleteHappy Blogoversary!!!!!! You r all that for sure.
ReplyDeleteThis post was spectacular...soooo funny and fantastic.
So glad to know you.
One of my favorites, I read this here and on LOL, cause that's how long I've been on ya.
ReplyDeleteTold you I'd be here all week!
Love it! So clever. And congratulations on your 1 year (and stretch it out all week...that's what celebrating is for!)
ReplyDeleteI laughed out loud the first time. Still has all of its magic.
ReplyDeleteIs like a 12th Night countdown without the religion and only lasting 7 days?
That was LOL HILARIOUS! It's now one of my faves :)
ReplyDeletelol. cant wait to see if God really looks like charlton heston...
ReplyDeleteThat's so funny! Love it when people post old posts from before I knew them:)
ReplyDeleteHappy blogoversary!
This is a funny post! Happy anniversary!
ReplyDeleteYay Day 2!!! I love that post!!!
ReplyDeleteI remember that! It seems like yesterday...
ReplyDeleteOkay - you Bible speech is hysterical. But the line that got me the most:
ReplyDelete2nd oldest saying, "I know her.... she won’t stop."
Bah!
Now, I kinda want to upload "The Ten Commandments" even though Easter's not for two more months...
You are hilarious!! Happy anniversary! So glad I found you.
ReplyDeleteHappy anniversary! Enjoy:)
ReplyDeleteOh this is this is hilarious, is there no limit to the places your mind can go when you write? Happy Day 2!
ReplyDeleteShould I admit that I haven't gone through all of your archives and read that one yet? Well I admitted it, and thank you for posting it again!
ReplyDeleteHappy day 2 of blogoversary!
You've accomplished much in a year!
ReplyDeleteHappy Anniversary Week!!
bahahaha. I thought that was your normal manner of speaking all along.
ReplyDeleteI'm still amazed at all you've accomplished in one year! :)
Keep the good stuff coming :-)
ReplyDeleteHappy anniversary, darling. We're all so very proud of you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, all, for stopping by to wish me Happy Blogoversary. As I said before, there's no party without you.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
Sweetheart! It's your blogoversary WEEK?! *Of course* it's a week long celebration! I would expect nothing less! Happy 1 year to you! You're phenomenal, amazing and totally kick ass. I feel lucky to know you! Truly. XO
ReplyDeleteI've now started talking in an accent
ReplyDeleteMy family thanks you
It's for their own good
"Is it because I am a simple woman? Is it because I do not strike fear in your heart?"
ReplyDeleteSo eloquent of prose and kindness personified ...
neither simple nor fear come to mind!
A week of your celebrations, sounds like a royal occasion indeed :)
HA!!!! Does that mean she wants us in the car? Guys?? LOL
ReplyDeleteThis was a great one. How you made the thou and thee's all make sense I will never know. :)
Before I started reading, I thought "Why is Anne Baxter in this post?". LOL Great stuff!
ReplyDeleteSent you some twitter love but just had to stop by and wish you a Happy Blogaversery! So glad we "met"!
ReplyDeleteHappy Blogaversary to you! I'm so proud and honored to say I knew you when . . .
ReplyDeleteYou are a force for GOOD in the world and the blogosphere! I've said it before: you are an inspiration to me and truly a wise mama role model for me. Hilarious and genuine! Thank you.
Dude, that's some funny shit. You can go wrong with a Ten Commandments parody. I love it. And that was your FIRST guest post? Sheesh, lady, you're makin' all of us look bad. :)
ReplyDeleteSo happy I made it for Day 2! How did I miss Day 1?? What kind of friend am I?! LOVE YOU, EMPRESS!
ReplyDeleteOh, I love it! Wouldn't motherhood be way more hip and divine if we could speaketh like thou dost?
ReplyDeleteLoving your week....could we stretch it out a bit?
Love it! Happy Blogoversary!!!
ReplyDeletei feel like you should come to my English class and translate everything I say into Shakespearean.
ReplyDeleteI love this post! It was such fun to read!
ReplyDeleteHappy 1st year! Yeah you.
ReplyDeletejj
Oh you are hysterical! This is great, I may have missed it then, but it's very kind of you to pull out the fun stuff for me to read now!
ReplyDeleteThat is so great. I want to speak all Ten Commandments-y to my daughter tomorrow. It would be great fun.....well, it would be great fun for me ;-) I'm not sure if she would like it or not.
ReplyDeletehappy blog versary!
ReplyDeleteHappy Blogoversary!!
ReplyDeleteAnd thus the Empress was born...
ReplyDeleteLOL, loooooove this. I totally thought you must have been watching Ten Commandments, too :p Brilliant, as usual.
ReplyDeleteOk, now I have to talk to the girl and the husband like this. And everyone else I run across.
ReplyDeleteThis post was hilarious!
ReplyDeleteAnn Baxter, the actor who was my very first crush. Silly me. I couldn't decide whether or not I loved her or Charlton Heston or Yul Bryner in that movie most. He had great muscles. But she was just so gorgeous. My parents thought I was over religious and let me watch the movie all the time.
While I did get a great education about Israel and their Exodus from Egypt, I memorized the lovely Ann Baxter's face. I memorized Charlton's arms and chest. . . and I drooled over Yul Bryner. I did that in secret though because he was the bad guy and I wasn't supposed to think he was cute. But he was HOT!!!!
Yet, as a grown, Finished lady, I the pastor have resolved those fine men as works of art and my heart still carries my love for Ann Baxter.
Am I allowed to say this out loud?