I quickly tweeted back: Anything with whipped cream!
Well, that suggestive bit of twitter triggered (twiggered?) cravings in me that I haven't had since I was last pregnant.
Stress eating, it feels so good, is it that wrong? A chocolate filled croissant warmed just a tad in the microwave? Rich hand whipped cream in a flavored coffee? It's not so bad.
When I'm stressed, I reach for the hot, the melted, the chocolate. Gooey cheesy burgers. Toasted bagels with slathered cream cheese, double loaded mozzarella on pizza, chocolate drizzled over anything.
I wish I could remember the tweeter who had asked for suggestions, because today, mama got some stuff for her:
Stress Eating Favorites:
Sliced bananas in a bowl mixed with microwave melted Hershey's kisses and mini marshmallows.
Graham cracker S'mores, 23 seconds in the microwave.
Hot cocoa with a 5 second squirt of Reddi-Whip. Chocolate sauce? Don't mind if I do.
McDonald's will mix half and half of any flavor shakes for you. Lately, I'm all into the half Arctic Orange with half Chocolate. Ho my god.
Peeled, sliced apples smothered in melted French Vanilla frosting.
Any kind of cupcake, any number of them. They don't count as cake calories because they're little.
Hot dog sliced down the middle and filled with shredded cheese, then wrapped in bacon and put under the broiler for 4 minutes. Dang.
A dinner plate full of Doritos chips, sprinkled with taco seasoned shredded cheese, diced tomatoes, crumbled turkey meat, microwaved for 1:25, then dolloped -- twice -- with sour cream and guacamole.
Guacamole. Period.
One scoop of chocolate ice cream with maraschino cherries on top. Mmmmm-hmmm.
Frozen Girl Scout Thin Mints.
Boy Scout Cheese Pop Corn.
Instant brownie in a box brownies slathered with raspberry preserves while they're still smoking hot.
Those Hot-Lava-Cake-in-5-microwave-minutes kits. Holy Wow.
Lay's Thick Cut Vinegar and Salt Potato Chips stuck in between the bun and hot sloppy joe meat.
25 crumbled crackers floating on top of a home made bowl of chili, heavy on the tomatoes.
The Martha Stewart Brand New Recipe for Boston Cream Pie cupcakes. Again, due to size, calorieless.
A baked potato, nuked, and stuffed with bacon bits, sour cream, cheddar cheese and a touch of salsa.
A tall glass of Fanta orange soda served over a big fat scoop of creamy vanilla ice cream: JUST like a dreamsicle.
Come on, Miss Stressed Out Eater Tweeter, where are you? ... I'm ready.
Flickr
cc
____________________________________________________
The foodie in me is going....YUM! The healthy foodie in me is going, "don't look! DON'T LOOK!"
ReplyDeleteThose are some amazing, delicious suggestions! I tend to NOT eat when I'm stressed, but LOVE to bake when I'm happy....hence my weight problem!
Oh, girl.
ReplyDeleteThis is evil.
I now want a midnight snack.
Wow - I thought this was going to be a short and sweet little list and I think I may have gain 5 pounds just reading it - my ass thanks you! We made home made shamrock shakes tonight and my daughter asked for a squirt of whipped cream in her mouth..my husband told her no as he finished doing it himself :)
ReplyDeleteYou're making me hungry.
ReplyDeleteSigned,
Pregnant Lady who can't stop eating
You sweet thing: you think you'll stop eating when you deliver??
DeleteBwaahahahahhahaha.
(sorry)
You can't see me licking the screen can you?
ReplyDeleteObviously you don't stress eat very often, or you wouldn't be as thin as you are!
ReplyDeleteCan I eat those all in one sitting?
ReplyDeletem.
Hold on ONE second. Martha Stewart has a new Boston Cream Pie Cupcake recipe? I didn't even know she had an old one.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, I will try to find this online. If I can't, I'm sending you an email and you'd best be prepared to send me the recipe. Because don't you know -- I LOVE BOSTON CREME STUFF.
For reals yo, this comment ain't no joke...
YES!!!!! (she hollers from the rooftops)
DeleteI had to skip the list. I just recently stocked my kitchen with healthy foods and started going to "boot camp." It would be too much temptation. Pardon me while I eat my plate of pineapple. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteI keep hearing the fish in Finding Nemo: "Swim away, swim away!" I can neither swim away or unsee the warm, gooey words you have written. I can't wait to get home. After stopping by the grocery store. Because the stress is about to meet some major stress rebuking counteraction.
ReplyDeletei did not know that trick on the smaores in the microwave....you may have just ruined my life...smiles....
ReplyDeleteFor me it's any sweet baked good. Oh with a large cup of strong coffee. That'll do, thank you very much.
ReplyDeleteOMG, I almost choked on my own spit I drooled so much. Clearly its amateur hour over here. I just go for the Hershey's chocolate fudge, heat it in the microwave and eat the whole darn thing. Thank Gawd they usually come in small bottles....
ReplyDeleteI.Know.
DeleteSo not cool when I gave up sweets for Lent. My mouth is watering.
ReplyDeleteHoly balls do all of those sound delicious! Especially the bacon-wrapped hot dog?? Dang is right! I think my ass just gained 5 pounds reading this. ;)
ReplyDeleteI have Thin Mints in my freezer right now... can't pass by fridge without a taste test to make sure they're still safe to eat...
ReplyDeleteAnd the hot dog with the cheese and the bacon?
That is so wrong in the best way ever.
Oh, dear god... it's like you know I packed--for the first time in my life--grapes and celery sticks as snacks today. How unfair is that?! Guacamole later tonight for sure. Just wish my girl scout order came in already. I'm all about frozen thin mints.
ReplyDeletepopcorn with glosette raisins mixed in - that's my go-to stress relief...however, I will be trying all of the above in the next few weeks. #ummthankyou?
ReplyDeleteI'm putting my thin mints in the freezer when I get home.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm a big fan of burgers for stress eating and delicious salty fries!
Lately I am super stressed. I had no business coming here and reading this. Tomorrow when I"m at the market, I'm going to try really really really hard not to use this list as my shopping list.
ReplyDeleteUmmmm yeah.
ReplyDeleteSo it's Friday afternoon and my kids just got home from school.
How do you suggest I break the news to them that we're staying in tonight so mama can eat?
(waiting for reply. with my mouth full. no pressure.)
Microwaved bananas, kisses and marshmallows? Apples and frosting? Orange soda over ice cream? I've landed in heaven.
ReplyDeleteYou guys are so awesome.
ReplyDeleteI'm still in D.C., but you're all doing such a great job keeping me in the loop.
I love this list: it's all bad. So what.
If we can't just sit and destress once in a while, then something is out of balance.
The melted chocolate with the sliced bananas and mini marshmallows: cured many a broken heart in college.
Will see you all very soon, and LOVE these comments!!!
You are evil. ;)
ReplyDeleteThis is a cruel, evil trick to play on someone in her final weeks of pregnancy. Gah.
ReplyDeleteWow. You've put some THOUGHT into this.
ReplyDeleteWhy I stay home: to invent snacks.
DeleteThat, and Target runs.
xo
I am so not a stress eater thank the lord because my ass would need its own postal code ;)
ReplyDeleteBut I do have a weakness for gummy bears.
Oh and since I can't eat a whole lot, I've been nomming on avocados like mad. They're soooooo good
Dang. You are so cute , you know that? Let's eat a baked potato together, k? Loved this.
ReplyDeleteIt's 1:30 in the morning and I'm trying to stifle the snickers (not what you're thinking) so I don't wake the house. And then that picture at the end is so fantastically over the top- I can only imagine WHO DRANK THE MODEL. Hmmm.
ReplyDeleteBut what's this national obsession with the Girl Scout Thin Mints? I (a former Brownie and Girl Scout) have been through cases of Thin Mints over the years until finally realizing: they don't come through! It's all tease. The texture is right, the size is perfect, the color, the description...even the smell. But it's as if the taste has been 90% extracted. "Just one more" was always about getting the fix I never got. Am I completely alone here? Do I have dead taste buds?
We ALL know the kind of "snickers" you speak of, Anne.
DeleteYou fool no one.
xo
Two words. Pork. Rinds.
ReplyDeleteGet thee behind me satan!
ReplyDeleteI should have eaten breakfast before I read this list. Now I want a stuffed potato and it is only 8:30 a.m.
ReplyDelete...Woman, you used to be NICE, before you were possessed by the Evil Diet Wrecker Demon! I don't have Hershey's Kisses in the house, but the bananas on the counter are about to go in the microwave with half a package of chocolate chips that I found at the back of the pantry. My eyes are glazed, and I am in chocolate zombie mode. Chocolate. Chocolate. CHOCOLATE!!!!!
ReplyDeleteMy guilty stress-eater pleasure of choice is the dark chocolate covered graham crackers at Starbucks. I get them in the drive through, and they come just two in a package. Which makes them too little to count, similar to your cupcake theory.
Oh my gosh! It is almost worth working myself up into some stress induced tizzy just to justify one, two...or more of these. I am pretty sure I can't rationalize them any other way (well, the chili or nachos could be dinner I suppose).
ReplyDeleteOh my god.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to Florida in a mere few weeks, so I'm trying to be really virtuous. This post nearly destroyed me. I'd better go bake up some crack.
melted french vanilla frosting?
ReplyDeleteis that even legal?
My stress eating has everything to do with saltiness, naughtiness, and Ranch dressing.
ReplyDeletethis may be the single most-evil blog post in the history of blogging.
ReplyDeleteSeriously. I always knew you had some evil in you - but this evil? I'd have never guessed.
HAHAH. I am laughing at myself, because I said to myself, "Self--your tiny boring lunch will be more satisfying if you go and fill yourself with some of your favorite blogs, catching up while you nibble." Now I'm starving! And I want a Fanta!
ReplyDeleteFanta.
DeleteAnd it must come from a gas station.
xo
I bow down to your greatness. For real.
ReplyDelete*highfive*
DeleteI can't eat when I'm stressed because I'm too busy stressing.
ReplyDeleteFrosting on apples? What are you some kind of genius? :) these must all be immediately added to our #snackbook do not pass go, do not skimp on the chocolate!
ReplyDeleteTo be in 2girlsonabench 's snackbook pages?
DeleteOH MY GARSH.
Pinch me.
your blog is JUST like a delicious, warm out of the oven, chocolicious midnight snack, and is a total stress reliever. so glad i've found you.
ReplyDeleteThank you.
Delete::deep curtsy::
Now I'm starving. For over buttered popcorn.
ReplyDeletePS I saw a 30 Rock episode recently in which Alec Baldwin was backing into his office with a very VERY large tray covered with croissants and danish pastry type things. Tina Fey looks at him, her jaw dropped, finally getting it: "Oh! You're a STRESS eater!" Such a great term. Think you're on to something...
ReplyDeleteAfter "mini marshmallows" I was yelling at myself inside "Close! Hit close and shut down this screen!" But I read the whole list and I am this close to running to the kitchen to grab my family packed Doritos...
ReplyDeleteYou are SO funny.
Deletexo