15 Thoughts I Had While Watching the #GOPTownHall

Last night, my city, Milwaukee, hosted the remaining three Republicans in the 2016 presidential race. The event was set up as a “Town Hall” format and I watched, not because I am rooting for any of these three and for sure not because a single one is my guy, but since a certain candidate's numbers are growing at an alarming pace and I plan on staying in America, I got to keep my eye on rhymes with Dump.

This morning, I am what can only be described as politically exhausted. The level of idiocy I heard from the stage went beyond astounding, jumped miles past ridiculous, and didn't even land in the territory of absurd.

More than once, I wanted to throw my garden clogs at the screen, but I kept myself in front of full view of what can only be described as two hours of proof that the only presidential candidate I saw on the stage last night was Anderson Cooper, the moderator.

I am in a confused fog as to who it appears America wants running our country, but in between the migraine that began to kick in, I managed to scribble these notes and tweet out my reaction to the words spoken by the three-headed TrumpKasichCruz behemoth.

Here are 15 thoughts I had last night while watching the #GOPTownHall. (other than the one that I kept muttering every 5 minutes, “I should run for president”)

1.)  It was a beautiful thing to witness when Anderson Cooper called Trump out for making a 5-year-old-child's argument, Trump was like, “No YOU have a 5-year-old's argument!” and then AC didn't even touch that one. Nope.

  

2.)  Let's hope that THIS TIME Trumpinators see what Trump is really like.

3.)  Why is Kasich wearing postal worker shoes? I mean, Sanders has confirmed gout and HE manages to suffer through the pain of polished wing-tips.

4.)  Will I ever be able to bring down my eyebrows that have now been up and raised for two hours?

5.)  Even my husband, the Republican of all time, is moaning.

6.)  Why didn’t I run for president?

7.)  Did Donald Trump just tell that dairy farmer that milking cows is SEASONAL?

 

8.)  How much longer do we have to endure this? November never seemed so far away.

9.)  I need Tylenol.

10.) I'm voting for Anderson Cooper. He's on that stage and I just made him a candidate tonight.

11.) We'd at least better get a T shirt at the end of all this: “I survived the f*ckery of the 2016 election season.”

12.) Note to self: never discount yourself from running for president again.

13.)  Checklist before next “Town Hall”: Tylenol? Check. Carbs for stress-eating? Check. Beer? Check.

14.) These candidates are just a scare tactic, right? To wake us up into voting and caring about our country, right? That saying, "I'm not voting if my candidate isn't the nominee WILL NOT CUT IT THIS TIME" won't work in 2016. *Damn good campaign tactic because IT WORKS.

  

15.) Those guys up there have me looking over at my husband like he's the most viable candidate of all time.

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I don't know if I can take another session like the one last night. Two hours of the viewing and auditory pain in support of my country has left me unable to turn my head to the right from the two hours straight of cringing I did.

 

My reaction to who is running for president can be summed up in one action item: I shall be that woman, that one who knocks on doors and registers voters and carries a sign “VOTE OR ELSE YOU CAN'T SAY A WORD ABOUT WHO TAKES OFFICE!” Also, I shall be that woman who makes signs for her kids to carry along as they march behind her, “VOTE. DO IT FOR THE CHILDREN!”

Bonus Thought #16:) Donald Trump is kind of a hot mess, isn't he?

 

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